Nepali Adult Jokes

Here are the Nepali Adult Jokes

Poor man catches a fish,
Wife couldnt cook coz there was
No gas,
No electricity,
No oil,
Then, man puts fish back in river..
Fish comes up n shouts..
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
”Baburam Bhattarai Zindabad!!” :P

 

 

Once. . .bill gates went to a restaurant. . . .and he gave a tip of only 2 dollars to the waiter. . . . .
Waiter wz surprizd at dis nd he said. . – yesterday ur s0n gave me a tip of 100 dolars. . .bt u. . .only 2!??
Wise reply by bill gates : he z the s0n of a billionare. . .bt m the s0n of a farmer. .:ppp

 

 

 

Why do woman rub their
eyes when they woke up??
…..
because they do not have balls to scratch.

 

 

 

Q : What’s the difference between Mother’s & Girlfriend’s tears??

A Classic Answer..

Mother’s tears “EFFECT Our HEART”
&
Girlfriend’s tears “EFFECT Our POCKET”….xD :P

 

(18+ joke)

Height of being horny
Girl:Dr.mero bf ko m*al ekdum thulo cha….
Jaba vitra jancha taba liver ma gayera thokincha….

Dr.- Uso vaye ma usko m*al choto banaidiu??

Girl-Nai doctor, bas mero liver lai alikati mathi saardinus….!!

 

 

A 23 yr old girl got pregnant
The Mother angrily shouts:
Who was dat pig? Call him here right now
30 min later, a big car stops in front of their house
A matured grey haired boy in an expensive suit steps out
Boy: I am sorry for the problem, But I cant marry her
If a boy is born, I’ll give u 2 stores, a villa & $ 2million
If a girl is born, I’ll give u 2 factories & $ 5million
But in case of a Miscarriage, what do u suggest I do?
Mother: F*** HER AGAIN! :P

 

Boy: hello, sweet heart..
Girl: hello dear,
Boy: K cha tani maya, malai temro
nikai yaad aai rahecha ni..
Girl: lau, agi varkhar kura garya
hoena phone ma?
…………….
Boy: Hyatterika, ferry temelai nai
garechu?? 

 

 

Teacher : Tell me a sentence that starts with an ‘I’.

Student : I is the ………

Teacher : Stop!! Never put ‘is’ after an ‘I’.

Student : Ok. I am the ninth letter of the alphabet. :P

 

 

Employee: Sir, you called me?
Boss: Yeah, Go to the restroom and masturbate.
Employee (after few minutes):Done sir. Boss: Do it again.
Employee:Done it again.
Boss: Do it once more.
Employee: Now I don’t have much stamina for it sir.

Boss: Very good. Here’s the keys of my car. Drop my daughter home

 

 

principal enter the classroom n kiss madam..n said: see children aids does not transmitt through kissing..
.

student: sir plzz show us how does it transmitt also..

 


धुर्मुसे मुलासाग को घर गयेर:-
धुर्मेसे:- ए मुलासाग मलाई तिम्रि छोरि को हात चहियो?
मुलासाग :- तलाई मुर्दार किन चहियो मेरो छोरि सुंतलि को हात???
.
.
.
धुर्मुसे:- किनकि अब मेरो हात थाकि सक्यो……..
बुझ्ने ले हास्नु, नबुझ्ने ले कार्टुन नेट्वोर्क हेर्दै बस्नु!

 

 

 

Cute Proposal. ♥

Boy: Aren’t Your Legs Paining?

Girl: No Why Are You Asking?

Boy: Because You Have Been Running In My Mind For A Long Time !♥! -.-

 

 

Nepali & American college principals argued that their students are fearless.
.
American college principle called d
students n asked to jump in sea full of sharks.
.
They jumped Principal said:
“see the guts”
.
Nepali Principal called the students
& told them to jump.
They said-
“pagal vako chas kya takle?”
.
Principal said :
“see the guts”:P

 

 

 

A beautiful girl asks lift from you.

On the way she faints and you take her to hospital. Doctor says

‘Congrats. You are going to become a father.

’THAT’S IT. YOU GET TENSED.

You say – ‘But that baby is not mine.’Girl says – ‘he is only the father of my baby.’

YOU HAVE MORE TENSION.

Police comes and DNA test is done. Report comes. Which says that you can never become a father.

EVEN MORE TENSION FOR YOU.

Anyhow you thank God and return home. Then you think, “At home I have 2 kids. Whose are those?”

THIS IS REAL TENSION…………

 

 

 

Man in bed with wife, sliding his hand slowly across her back,shoulders, jst brushing her, legs, spreads her legs apart & runs his hand everywhere moves back towards top & stops.
Wife gasps..”Why did u stop…hmm..?”

Man-Remote vetiyo….timi suta aba….

 

 

 

Teacher: Explain responsibility.

Student: mam your blouse has
four buttons, if three buttons
break down the entire
responsibility will be on the
fourth one……….

 

 

 

A 13 year girl at a bra shop…
Girl-show me bra
.
Shop keeper-36″?
.
Girl-smaller
.
Shop keeper-32″?
.
Girl-smaller
.
Shop keeper-24″?
.
Girl-smaller
.
Shop keeper-20″?
.
Girl-smaller
.
Shop keeper(in angry)-madam u take some
cream it must b a pimple………


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